Hugely busy week, not made any easier by my promotion to Acting Marketing Manager – woohoo - and my wonderful editor at ‘Nett Magazine’, Josh Mehlman, forgetting to tell me next Monday’s copy deadline has been bumped back two weeks. (He’s going to read this and claim it was deliberate to help me get ahead of the curve. Trouble is, he’s probably right!).

The response to my offer of guest posts was incredibly successful, meaning I’ll be busy in the evenings for the next few weeks submitting posts to some great blogs. You will also start to see some guest bloggers here as well, giving me a break when I need it. I love how the blogging community continues to help build each other.

Watching the Watchmen

It´s been twenty years in movie development hell, but finally, ‘Watchmen' will make it to screens next year.

The problems have always been adapting a densely structured and immensely detailed mammoth work into a two hour film. Something was always going to be lost in the translation and this has been enough to discourage many of the names previously attached to the project.

Thankfully, after his incredible success with ‘300' last year, Zach Snyder was brought on board. His ability to translate the comic image to the page has already been proven, so we can now rest easy that the visuals will be taken care of. Not we just need to worry about the script.

And if you needed proof, here is the first teaser trailer. It is clear Snyder has used Dave Gibbons’ original artwork as storyboards for the film as some of the shots are fantastically close to Gibbons’ layouts. There are also sufficient snippets of certain scenes to indicate many of the key plot-beats are still in place. The trip to Mars, the Vietnam flashbacks, the rioting. Previously released photos have also revealed the newspaper vendor storyline (with the young boy reading ‘Voyage of the Black Freighter’) is also included.

The trailer quite rightly describes ‘Watchmen’ as the most celebrated graphic novel of all time. To any of you who are unfamiliar, this is true. ‘Watchmen’ is not, repeat NOT, to be considered just another superhero yarn. This is the closest superhero comics have ever come to serious literature. After the wonderful adaptation of ‘V For Vendetta’, it looks like the trend of dismal Alan Moore adaptations has ended Here’s hoping I’m right!

Cue fanboy geeky delight.

Piracy is Good?

I’m currently writing an article for ‘Nett Magazine’ on the evolution of copyright online and the development of new business models that take advantage of the distribution landscape currently dominated by piracy. In carrying out research, I came across Mark Pesce, an evangelist for new business models that embrace the modern realities of consumers downloading behaviour. Mark has been very helpful in providing material to me. I hope to extract more from his brilliant brain in the future.

In his lecture for AFTRS – ‘Piracy is Good?’ - Mark puts forward some highly persuasive arguments for the commercial adoption of bittorrent. It’s an hour long, but well worth watching if you have any interest in accessing or distributing your media online. It is also available as a text article.

Woof Contest – Top Five Picks

The votes are in and CopyWrite is happy to be included in the Top Five Picks for the week over on the Plotdog website. Each week, Plotdog Press highlights five noteworthy blog posts relating to writing in all its forms. Bloggers who produce quality posts on writing are encouraged to submit their posts to be reviewed and voted upon by Plotdog readers

Hand me the envelope please…

About Writing and Author Interviews / About Poetry

Kimota - “How to Become a Writer - the Harsh Reality”

Annetta Ribken - “Finding The Time To Write”

Robert Stevenson - “For improved writing think visually”

Qugrainne - “Cluttered Desk, Cluttered Mind, Clear Desk…….”

Flash/Fiction – Serial Fiction

Jennifer M Scott - “In Pursuit of Jack”

Brought to you by Plotdog Press, featuring: "Stephen King’s Bones"

And Finally…

Listening to… ‘Nine Inch Nails – Ghosts I-IV’. Perfect soundtrack to writing. It is also released under a Creative Commons license, allowing fans to reuse the tracks within their own non-commercial work. I’ll be writing more soon on how Trent Reznor is creating new models for distributing intellectual property online.

Reading… ‘Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix’ – this could take a while. Also recently reread the old ‘Mean Arena’ comic strips originally published in ‘2000AD’ in the early ‘80s. I loved this comic adventure as a twelve-year-old so was excited to find it reprinted.

As you were. Class dismissed.

There are a few different ways that misinformation occurs. The problem is that the internet amplifies each of these errors to dangerous proportions.

Careless Misinformation

The lemming example is a perfect illustration of how misinformation can become pervasive and enter into common knowledge We’ve all believed lemmings are naturally suicidal animals for years; great hordes of lemmings racing off cliffs to commit suicide by the truckload. It is such an ingrained piece of knowledge that it is the first – and probably only – fact anyone brings to mind when discussing the furry little critters. Lemming suicide is the butt of jokes and even the basis for that series of addictive computer game fifteen years ago. Did you know it was untrue?

The lemming myth seems to have originated from 19th Century naturalists, who grabbed the wrong end of the proverbial on studying them in their native habitat in Norway. This myth was given further weight by a famous Walt Disney nature film, ‘White Wilderness’, released in 1958. In their attempts to capture a mass suicide of lemmings on film, the filmmakers simply brought truckloads of lemmings to Alberta, Canada, and threw them into a river while the cameras rolled.

The filmmakers thought they were merely recreating a commonly occurring natural event, but what they in fact did was perpetuate and cement a myth that has endured ever since. It was because the original naturalists did not clearly understand what they were seeing that assumptions were made and stories told. Although the truth has been established for a long time by scientists, the myth is now so well entrenched that the concept of the suicidal lemming will probably always remain with us.

What this story illustrates is how misinformation can create a world-view just as strong and just as widely believed as the truth and can dramatically alter one’s perception of reality. After all, reality is a very individual thing. We all perceive the world around us based on the information and experiences we store in our heads.

On the internet, this sort of misinformation is rife. Fact-checking is not always common within the blogosphere, for example. Many are content to regurgitate 'popular wisdom' instead of checking the truth of their claims, and thereby perpetuate myths. How many times have you come across an email chain that puts forward a sensational 'fact' which on closer inspection is distorted? How often do you come across an email or a blog post that distorts the truth by only including half the story?

Recently, I received an email chain about Joe Arpaio, a county sheriff in Arizona. The email, commonly reposted around the net so you can read it for yourself, displays some of the methods Joe uses within his prison system and is obviously aimed at that proportion of the population who believe criminals should be treated like dogs. On the chain email I got, many previous recipients had already added their comments supporting the guy. Lots of 'hell yeahs" etc.

So I did some research. I didn't have to look far - Wikipedia was able to provide far more context to the information than offered by the email. Here was mention of the various court judgements against Arpaio's office, the 2,150 law suits against him and the class action law suit currently running that claims Arpaio is violating the constitutional rights of detainees. Despite the deaths in detention, the harm caused and the $50 million in claims against his office, a recent study showed no decrease in recidivist behaviour when compared with the previous term. Changes your perception of the original information, doesn't it.

Redundant Knowledge

Sometimes, as with our knowledge of the moon, misinformation is merely caused by the progression of human knowledge. What we know to be true today can be exposed to be false tomorrow. Such is the case with the moon (although the additional moons are so inconsequential that they are unlikely to figure in anything but the most nerdish of conversations).

The march of human knowledge will never stop, and will always result in the printing of new text books and the updating of encyclopedias. We will always trust the most recent edition of an encyclopedia over one from twenty years ago. Trouble is, on the net the date of submission is not always so obvious in the information we process.

One of the strengths of the internet is the ability to respond incredibly fast to new information. The problem is that the old information doesn’t necessarily get deleted when the new information is uploaded. I carried out a search in Google today while researching a magazine article. I was served hundreds of responses and began to sift through. What I discovered was that the top results were actually 3 or 4 years old. When I did find more recent articles on the subject, on page 2 of the results, the newer information contradicted and updated the older information. What Google is unable to do is check the factual context of the results delivered. There isn’t an algorithm available that can track whether the facts are still understood to be true.

As such, we need to be continually vigilant that when we use the internet for a source of information, and where possible, restrict ourselves to the most recent data.

The Mythologising of Celebrity

As the above example shows, information around famous figures seems particularly susceptible to misinformation. Raleigh is a far more familiar historical figure than an obscure French explorer and is therefore brought more immediately to mind when discussing the period. Plus, rumour sticks when celebrity is involved. Raleigh obviously was getting better PR than Nicot.

No place is this issue of celebrity rumour more evident than Wikipedia.

Wikipedia was touted as a complete comprehensive database, with accuracy maintained through democracy. Anyone can edit and update information within Wikipedia, correcting mistakes and producing knowledge based on consensus. As Mashable recently pointed out, what seems like online democracy at its best may actually be a distorted misinformation.

Mike Scott of The Waterboys wrote in ’The Guardian’ about his experiences with Wikipedia. He had discovered his biography on the site, only to discover factual inaccuracies. He edited and corrected the entry – probably the most qualified person to do so. Yet, within hours, Mike’s corrections would be removed to be replaced with the inaccuracies. The mythic Mike Scott was proving stronger than the real person.

Mike was eventually able to prove the truth in his words and his listing is now accurate. But it is this ability for people to hang onto misinformation – even when faced with the truth – that makes online democratic information a risky proposition.

This cloud of misinformation is even more apparent in politics. With a presidential election happening a few months from now in the US, we can expect media manipulation and the careful drip-feeding of information to build a manufactured perception of the characters in our minds. As each side releases a new 'factoid', our perceptions are challenged and adjusted. But our perceptions may never actually be accurate. We are presented with a myth, a cloud of opinions and sound-bites and carefully worded statements in place of the complete and uncontested truth about either candidate. We are used to this phenomenon and can usually engage our critical faculties to make a judgement, but the internet dramatically increases the ability to mould perception through misinformation.

Just Give Me the Facts, Ma’am

The power of the internet is such that inaccuracies and myths can be spread far wider and far more pervasively than ever before in human history. Accepted knowledge becomes the knowledge most commonly believed to be true, instead of what is actually true. The group consensus becomes truth and reality becomes transient and changeable.

Sometimes the small voice of authority pointing out the truth can be lost underneath the blogs and forums and bulletin boards and websites and social media services continuing to project the falsehood. Even worse, there are those times when information is willingly falsified for some other – usually commercial or political – gain. These deliberate falsehoods add further mud into the pool of knowledge, continuing the dilution of the reliability and usefulness of the internet.

It has long been said that history is written by the victors. We have known of this bias in all of our information for centuries. But never before has history, and all human knowledge, been recorded by such a large – and often misinformed - committee.

The biggest global repository for human knowledge we have ever known needs to be treated with respect. Adding to this huge database of facts should be a huge responsibility, but is virtually unregulated when compared to traditional forms of information. Recently, there has been talk of creating a code of conduct for bloggers to bring a sense of community responsibility to one of the most powerful communication tools available. Bloggers have as much influence as journalists in creating the cloud of information we are faced with every day. But how many blogs have perpetuated falsehoods or spin or outright lies in the serving of personal agendas? And how does this distort the greater sum of online knowledge?

In a sense, the internet is becoming our 'hive-mind', but one that has an unparalleled ability to shape the way we see the world and behave within it. 'The Matrix' may not be such an unreal idea after all, as the internet grows in influence over our daily lives. Sure, we won't be living within a computer construct, but if the world I experience is filtered through the knowledge and information that forms my opinions and behaviour, how real can that world ever be? How much of what I believe is based on falsehood or careless omission or bias? And will that trend continue to increase?

If we continue to allow truth to fight an unfair fight with inaccuracy online, we risk promoting myth and spin. With our perception of the world and everything within it distorted and biased, we could find ourselves, like lemmings, led by misinformation over the cliff of ignorance.

* (The 'Misinformation Facts' quoted in this article are taken from 'The QI Book of General Ignorance', based on the brilliant BBC TV panel show.)

Yup, you too can now enjoy the wonders of having Kimota appear on your blog.

I've been thinking about doing some guest posts for a while now, but it took the wonderful Kimberley Bock (Spostareduro) inviting me to guest post on her blog 'Learning SEO Basics' that actually spurred me into action. This weekend I'll be crafting a post I hope will be worthy of her readers, especially as Kim has built a reliable and popular blog over time.

Guest posting is a fantastic way of creating strong relationships between blogs and also building traffic. By guest posting, you are reaching someone else's audience who, if your content is good enough, may just decide to check you out further. Of course, to the blog owner, guest posts help to get new content up - you can never have too many posts, after all.

So why stop at one guest post?

There are plenty of wonderful bloggers who read these pages. Therefore, if any of you would like to include a guest post from me, simply drop me a line, or complete the form below, and I may just take you up on the offer.

All I ask is that each post obviously includes the bio I can provide and links to the sites I write for. That way, guest posting can provide links and traffic to the sites I am tasked with while providing your readers with further relevant reading.

Some of you may already be thinking about asking me for possible guest posting gigs here on CopyWrite. I do want to include guest posts in future, but it will be by invitation only, in the same way as some of you may invite me to participate on yours. I much prefer being asked instead of sending out unsolicited posts or pestering busy webmasters and am taking this policy both ways. That prevents any awkwardness in saying no to anyone and maintains a consistent style and standard on the blog - exactly as it should be.

I love the blogging community and it is fantastic for everyone when blogs work together to build a vibrant space for online discussion, ideas and creativity. Guest posting on blogs is a great way for all of us to add to this, so I recommend any blogger gives it a shot if they can.

And that's all there is to it.

I'm counting down until I can get to see 'The Dark Knight' this weekend. Let's hope it won't disappoint like some other recent blockbusters I could mention. In the meantime, you may have noticed I've been tweaking the site here and there trying to fix some irritating browser issues. I've been a Firefox user for a long time and find it hard to understand why some people still insist on using IE. But some of you do, so I've been working on hacking the code to make this site appear more consistent and clean for you.

Last time I checked, though, I noticed that IE users number far less than Firefox users among my visitors. The ratio is quite different and the rankings reversed from the standard online split between the two. So I salute the fact that my readership is obviously smarter and more technically discerning. Bravo.

For those IE users reading this and wondering what I've got against you, I have nothing against you at all. Just the bugs in your browser.

Entrecard

You may have noticed I have started experimenting with Entrecard. (For those of you that didn't notice, it's that 125x125 advert in the sidebar listed as 'Blog of the Day'.) The idea is that Entrecard bloggers need to visit enough blogs each day to gain credits that can be exchanged for advertising on other blogs. This then boosts traffic. Hopefully.

Actually, the vast majority of the traffic is from Entrecard users themselves merely looking to 'drop' their card and earn a credit. Therefore, they rarely stay to read. The bounce rate is high and the time spent on site has gone through the floor. But, you know what? I don't care.

Entrecard, like StumbleUpon, is about producing vast volumes of traffic to create more opportunities for discoveries. Just like my SU traffic, Entrecard visitors are numerous, but often click on through without stopping. But it's all about the percentages. If I get 500 hits from Entrecard users every day, but only a small percentage stick around or subscribe, it still builds my blog better than not having them at all. In the few days I've been involved, I have already received some incredible feedback from the few that did stick around - particularly from Netta at Word Webbing - showing that I can at least network with a few other strong blogs. Even if 500 daily Entrecard visitors only results in one extra subscriber a day, I'm still a winner. One new subscriber a day over a few months produces a pretty strong blog. (PS. if you haven't already subscribed, hit the orange button in the sidebar or enter your email address. It's free and keeps you in touch.)

Also, large amounts of traffic can be useful in other ways. For those of you that care about Alexa rankings, receiving high amounts of traffic - regardless of their quality - can boost your ranking and increase your reach. These are all figures that can then be used to further market the blog.

Anyway, it is early days. Do me a favour and check out the blogs I've chosen to appear in my Entrecard widget - there are some particularly good ones coming up. But don't click on it until you have finished reading this post.

Keyword Searches

Every now and then, I like to check on the search engine keywords people are using that bring them to my site. Almost always, I am not presented with keywords I would expect or hope for - like "how to become a writer" or "copywriting" - but am presented with phrases that either have me banging my head against the wall or giggling uncontrollably to myself.

So it was with a snigger and a thump that I looked at the latest list of most commonly used search terms bringing traffic to this blog.

By far the front runner is 'How to become a superhero' where I currently appear as one of the top results in Google. No, that isn't a joke. People actually think Google will tell them how to gain superpowers and fight crime. With variations on this phrase ('how to be a superhero' for example) also appearing strongly in the top ten, this quest for superpowers is a steady traffic flow for me.

Of course, what they are presented with in the Google results is my article 'How to Become a Superhero' - a satirical countdown of the ridiculous methods comic books use in superhero origins. This did elicit a rather offensive comment (not published) - presumably from one of these hopeful Google clickers - that the article was 'stupid' and 'unhelpful'. Because I am sure there are many websites out there promoting a realistic five-step plan to irradiating yourself in the hope of Hulking out or walking up walls when needed.

What's even scarier is that some of these people probably have driver's licenses. The guy in the next lane to you driving home tonight may be crazy enough to think superpowers are real and spandex is a practical all-weather outfit. And he's in charge of fast-moving heavy machinery. Time to get that roll-cage fitted and start wearing the helmet.

The other group of common keyword searches continues to vex me. 'How to copywrite my screenplay' is only one example of the hundreds of keyword searches driving traffic to my blog in the hope I can answer their legal questions on 'copyright'. That's right - it's COPYRIGHT people. Copywriting is something else entirely, as I pointed out in my post on the different definitions of 'Copy Write Versus Copyright'.

Rule one in anyone's quest to want to become a writer - understand the difference between two words that will have a significant bearing on your future career - if you ever get one. This keyword mistake sends about 2 or 3 visitors to my blog every single day - and each time it is like nails on a chalkboard to me. I want to reach through the monitor screen, grab them by their IP address and revoke their right to claim to be a writer until they've swallowed a dictionary or two.

Okay, the breathing exercises help sometimes. Calm blue ocean. Calm blue ocean. Calm blue ocean.

Kimota Around the Web

Rounding up any other articles I may have pushed out into the online space in the last seven days.

Over at Planet Domain, I relaunched their news centre with an article on the importance of optimising your website and Adwords campaign to convert more customers. 'You're Fired. Is Your Adwords Campaign a Bad Salesman?'

'Nett Magazine' has recently uploaded a lot of recent articles onto their website, including some of the 'Kick Start' panels I am involved with. I am called in once a month to participate on an industry panel to advise a new start up business owner on how to plan and grow effectively. I obviously cover the online aspects and have evangelised blogging on a virtually monthly basis.

'Kick-Start - Skirting a Fashion Disaster' sees the panel take on a new online fashion retail outlet. 'Start Up - Motion Messengers' advises a courier company how best to grow in the Sydney market. 'Start Up - When is a Cube Not a Cube' covers the online plans for a new power-washer product.

And Finally...

Currently listening to 'Portishead - Third'. Amazing to hear them back after ten years.

Marvel Comic's summer crossover 'Secret Invasion' has me hooked, while DC's supposedly ground-breaking event 'Final Crisis' already has me wondering whether I should even bother getting the next issue.

As you were. Class dismissed.

Since starting this blog last year, I have regularly been asked about how to become a professional writer. Mary, one of my keener subscribers (see – I didn’t forget you), recently raised the topic again and prompted me to think some more on it. Some of the issues related to this discussion I covered previously in my series on ‘The Professional Writer’, but what I didn’t cover was how to get writing work in the first place.

For many, the article that follows may seem negative and discouraging. That is not my intent. I merely want to illustrate the harsh realities of the grit, learning, commitment and – let’s face it – luck that goes into convincing someone to actually pay you for your words.

Harsh Reality Number 1 – Writing is Like No Other Job

I achieved the goal of professional writing last year, a few weeks before I started this blog to discuss my experiences and observations. But, and I really do stress this, I had been working towards this goal since approximately the age of twelve. That’s about a clear quarter of a century of plodding away at my amateur scribblings and working in other industries – from dirty factories to bland offices - as I waited for the stars to align correctly. So, for those of you who have only recently decided to pursue a career in writing, don’t expect it to be as easy as applying for any other job you’ve held.

Writing is definitely not a regular job. Sometimes, it can seem like it. I travel to the office every morning and work from my cubicle next to the marketing department, across from accounts and a floor above the sales team. But when trying to get a writing job, the differences become apparent.

Finding work as a writer is more akin to launching a career as an artist. It takes more than just knowing which way to hold the paint brush or pencil coupled with a determination to succeed. It takes talent – and I’m sorry, but that doesn’t come with an easy course at the local adult education centre.

What is the lesson here? Follow your dream, but be prepared that it may take time, persistence and heartache. Also, be prepared that it may never happen.

This leads to the next point.

Harsh Reality Number 2 – Supply Far Outstrips Demand

It is commonly said that 95% of professional actors are out of work at any one time. Similarly, there are thousands of artists devoted to their craft but unable to turn their passion into a bank balance. For writers, a similar figure is probably true. All of the creative professions are popular career paths. So many children grow up with dreams of being an actor or a painter or a writer, before giving up and becoming a postman instead. But many will continue to follow the dream and remain disappointed. Supply and demand.

Even among those who have achieved the right to put their dream profession down on their passport application, the road isn’t smooth. Not all writers have a full time job. For many it is a shuffle from commission to freelance commission, an article at a time. You can also look at the books in your local store and be sure that most of the names you see on the spines are still working another job waiting for their publisher to call them back. It is one thing to get a first piece of writing published. It is another thing entirely to keep the flow of work and money constant.

I am incredibly lucky as I have a regular salary to do what some of you are begging to do. I don’t have to worry about whether I have enough work next week to pay the rent – unlike my fiancé who runs her own salon. But her situation of an up-and-down income is far closer to most writers. In fact, for many writers, down is more common than up.

Some artists may get work as illustrators or graphic designers or – heaven forbid, a seaside caricaturist to the tourists - as a way of keeping the rent flowing while their oil-splattered canvases are pushed to one side. Actors may get simple ‘fill-in’ work as extras or may be lucky enough to find ongoing contracts as a drama teacher. Far too many actors finish up in a theme park inside a giant chicken suit. A friend of mine once told me the story of how he got talking to the guy inside a kangaroo suit as part of a touring children’s show. The actor admitted to having spent three years at drama school before finding himself in a hot and stuffy foam costume jumping around trying desperately not to knock over the toddlers. Training and qualifications are not necessarily the golden ticket to an acting career. The same goes for art and writing.

For writers, I guess the equivalent would be taking one of those paid blogging jobs that are advertised all the time. These are the jobs where you pump out ten or more generic short blog posts a night for a few dollars each that are sold onto people with no idea of the importance of quality content. Or there are those ‘paid’ blogging jobs that rely on advertising revenue to provide an income, the writer’s equivalent to commission work. Not recommended for someone looking to keep the eviction notice from the front door.

The lesson? There is absolutely no guarantee of obtaining a regular income from writing, no matter how talented you are or how much preparation you have put in. Be prepared to start anywhere and compromise your dream to stay paid.

Harsh Reality Number 3 - Are You Really a Writer?

I’ve been a member of many writing groups online. By far the most illuminating for me were the forums at Project Greenlight Australia. (You can read my previous post on my experiences in the competition.) The range of skill on show was immense, but it was very quick to work out who stood a chance of achieving their dream and who would forever remain convinced that the world just doesn’t recognize their ‘genius’. Writing is about more than having ideas and stringing words together (although I’ve come across some aspiring writers that have trouble even with that). Professional writing means understanding how words work, what structure is, how to shape tone and atmosphere, pace and meaning.

Above all, writing is about clarity. If the reader has to ask you what you meant, you’ve failed as a writer. This was a common issue among some amateur writers at Project Greenlight. If someone were to suggest they had difficult understanding the events of Act Two, for example, the writer would imply that it was the reader’s fault for not understanding. A failure to get the message across to an averagely literate person is ALWAYS the writer’s fault.

I have a shelf at home bulging full of ‘how to write’ books. Books on the structure of screenplays. Books on how to build a dramatic storyline. Books on crafting a killer final act. Books on character, story arcs and the seven basic plots. Books on grammar. Books on the evolution and history of the language. Books on modern usage. Books on the techniques of successful writers. Books on copywriting. Books on proofreading and editing. Books on formatting. And there’s more, I’m sure of it.

I have read every single one. Some of them twice.

Does reading a lot of ‘how to’ books make me a writer? No. But if I want to repair my own car, I don’t open the bonnet and assume because I can drive that I can tune the engine. Just because you can read or write to a high-school standard doesn’t mean you can ‘Write’ write. Filling journals of your heart-felt poetry at home or having a hard-drive full of great ideas for films that only make sense to you doesn’t make you a writer any more than cutting my own grass and weeding the rockery makes me a landscape gardener.

During Project Greenlight, I came across many people who felt their enthusiasm and high school English education were enough to make them writers. These were often the same people that would sneer at discussions of structure or pace, believing these complex ideas were not for them. What I suspect is that these people dismissed the tools of a true writer, because to admit they are important would mean admitting to themselves that they weren’t ready to be a writer.

What is the lesson here? Follow the rules of the masters – whether in grammar or structure or pace or format or anything. The rules exist because they work. If you can’t describe how the plot beats of your script fit into the three act structure, can’t define onomatopoeia or explain the difference between a simile and a metaphor, you need to ht the books. Amateurs should never avoid the rules and only the most gifted of proven writers can – sometimes – break the form. Ignorance of the rules is no excuse.

Harsh Reality Number 4 – You Need to Write for Free Before You Can Write For Money

So, how did I get this job? What quirk of fate allows me to spend my entire working day playing with words at a keyboard for a salary?

Last year I was working as the office manager in an employment agency. After ten years of success in that field, I really felt I had delayed my quest for a more creative career for too long. I applied for everything in the media and creative industries. In my time, I’ve worked as a cameraman, video editor, radio presenter, nightclub DJ and promoter, so I certainly had a number of possible avenues to pursue.

I achieved a number of very different interviews before the one that changed my life. I had responded to a small ad requesting an ‘editor’ for an online marketing company. Specifically, they needed a copywriter for search engine optimisation purposes. For those of you that don’t know, search engine optimisation involves crafting the copy on websites around very specific words and phrases in order to rank higher in Google and thereby attract more customers. Don’t worry - before I attended the interview, I had never heard of SEO either.

In the interview, we discussed a wide range of topics. How would I approach different clients? Was I good at researching topics I knew nothing about (after all, I would be writing whatever websites were needed). But I think one thing sealed the deal for me.

My future boss indicated that he had received a number of applications for the role, but that a large amount contained basic errors of spelling or grammar and a great deal more were unable to back their skills up with concrete samples. On the other hand, I had spent a weekend building and writing this very website to help in my search for a job and I had included a link in my application.

The employer was able to follow the link and read exactly how I write. He was able to sample a few pages of web copy and gauge how I approach online writing. The website included PDFs of other writing samples; scripts, a short story and links to other websites I had a hand in producing. Of course, he liked what he found and offered me the job.

This is what I mean by working for free before working to get paid. These samples demonstrated my abilities as a professional writer. Now, understand I didn’t give him a portfolio of poetry or links to a cheesy Stevie Nicks fan club site. The work I used to demonstrate my ability was work that appeared professional, even though I had completed them as an amateur. Everything I write, amateur or not, has always been treated with the seriousness and attention to detail of a professional job.

Formatting and layout are crucial with this. If you’ve ever written a movie script, you should already be aware of how anally-retentive professional script-readers are when it comes to formatting. The wrong indentations or a failure to use CAPS for certain directions can be enough to see your script filed in the shredder, regardless of whether you have written the most amazing Act 3 ever committed to foolscap. The same is true across all writing.

The lesson: A professional writer behaves like a professional writer long before being paid to be a professional writer.

Harsh Reality 5 – There’s More to Writing Than Writing

I started the job a few days later. I was shown to my work station, was given a description of my duties and then was told that, until customer copywriting orders started arriving, I was to help completely overhaul the existing website while writing articles and blog posts on issues concerned with online marketing and ecommerce. Remember, I knew nothing of SEO and all the other techniques online marketers used, but I was now required to not only write the pages of a website selling these services, but also to write detailed and informative articles on the subject.

So I did what a writer does best if he isn’t writing. I read.

Every lunch break I was buying and reading industry magazines. Every spare moment I had, I was visiting social media sites, such as Sphinn, that specialise in online marketing. I subscribed to more blogs than I could conceivably read in a week. I created this very blog as an extension to the original website so that I could practice the principles I was reading and test them out for myself. I knew that merely regurgitating the facts I read elsewhere would be meaningless. I needed to know these things first hand by doing.

In the evenings, I was still at the PC, either reading, Sphinning or coding the website. Very soon, I was submitting my own articles to Sphinn and was encouraged by the response. By January, I not only had the blog off and running with a number of subscribers, but I began writing on these topics for Nett Magazine, a new small business ecommerce title released in Australia in December.

I went from ignorance to authority on the topic of online business and internet marketing in weeks. The boss was now coming to me for advice on how to improve the link structure of the site. My name was becoming recognised in the online community.

As a result, I no longer carry out customer copywriting jobs. We have employed a young journalism graduate to deal with customers as I have inadvertently created a brand new role within the organization – that of Marketing Communications Manager. And I got a whacking pay rise to boot. My duties are pretty much as you would expect. I blog and write articles to build brand awareness of Netregistry and its subsidiaries, while creating and running the new social media campaigns we have implemented as a result of my work.

Without all this additional research and commitment and sweat and experimentation, I would not be in this job. If I hadn’t thrown myself into working every moment I had with a passion to fully understand and become an informative voice in the industry, I probably wouldn’t have lasted in the industry longer than five minutes. Anyone can turn up to a job at 9 and leave at 5. Anyone can claim that it is up to other people to train them or provide guidance. I chose to create the writer I wanted to be, with no half measures and plenty of sacrifices along the way.

The lesson? Be a writer 24x7. Always reading, always learning, always observing. Your writing is only ever as good as the information you have to impart or the unique perception you have. Make sure your message is worth writing about and live it with a passion.

Conclusions

So there you go. I know that’s not as simple an answer as some of you were hoping for. I can’t provide you the number of an employment agency for writers. I can’t give you any shortcuts or backdoors into your dream. A writing career is a result of determined graft and nothing else, no courses, no contacts, no books and no tricks can replace that. Having said that, the courses, the books and the contacts are all necessary too.

And a massive dose of luck.

As I said at the beginning, I don’t mean any of this to be demotivating – merely realistic. If you read any of the above and felt intimidated by the truth, then maybe you need to very carefully think about whether your dream is best left that way. But, alternatively, if you are destined to be a writer, you will overcome adversity and stick at it with the gumption to do the things I did. Just remember, there are no guarantees and always have a second job.

Way back in 2004, I entered the Australian version of the Project Greenlight competition. Modelled on the US cable TV show devised by Matt Damon and Ben Affleck, the series applies the Pop Idol principle to movie scriptwriting. The winning script would be produced for cinematic release, directed by the winning scriptwriter, and with a $1 million budget.

My vampire script, ‘Nightfall’, achieved a top twenty placing before elimination. I can still remember the devastation I felt on receiving the call informing me I wasn’t going through to the Top Ten. But, considering that there was a full field of 1200 entries, and that elimination up to that point had been through a complex peer-review process followed by an experienced industry panel, this was enough to encourage me to develop the script further.

That first competition was won by Morgan O'Neill and his fantastic script which was filmed and released as 'Solo' to great reviews.

And so, when Project Greenlight Australia series 2 was launched in 2005, I was ready with an even stronger version of the script. Draft 7 in fact. This is more or less the version currently available on my website.

"Lights, Camera, Action!"

This time, there wasn’t a top twenty ranking between the top fifty elimination round and the final ten. Also, the producers had decided that all fifty would be required to produce a three minute video depicting a scene from their script, thereby demonstrating their chops as a director.

Sadly, again I missed out on a top ten placing, and the final prize went to Kenn and Simon McRae and their script 'The View From Greenhaven Drive'.

This time I was less surprised. I wasn’t happy with my video entry. Unlike some of the other contestants, it had been years since I’d picked up a video camera. In fact, quite a few of the top fifty contestants came from video production backgrounds, with the equipment, resources and experience to produce incredibly professional looking pieces. I was competing against people who regularly submitted films to Tropfest or were already working as cameramen or production staff within the film or television industries. Although I had studied film and television at university way back in the 1980s, I had never edited video on a digital suite and was resorting to using Microsoft MovieMaker on my home PC to cut the video. I know - shoot me now.

I chose what I thought would be a simple, yet dramatic scene; a scene that would catch the judges’ interest without overstretching my limited ability. One with mood and emotion and the opportunity for some cool angles. I found a wonderful derelict house – all smashed windows, mouldy carpet and walls covered in graffiti – to serve as the location. Through friends, I was able to secure the help of two actors - Matt Butcher and Nicole Verhoeven - to bring my characters to life. In my day job as manager of an employment agency, I came across an out-of-work sound engineer, Jonathan Hunter, who offered to help with the audio requirements and brought along his own mikes. A local film student, Zayaan Jappe, offered her services as AD. Finally, my Mum stumped up some cash to hire a decent camera, saving me from resorting to my sister’s handycam.

Disaster Movie

Of course, what I planned as a simple shoot turned into a logistical nightmare. Creating night inside the squat was as simple as blocking out all light from the windows. But then we had major issues creating a realistic lighting scenario. With no professional studio lighting, we were using camping lanterns and torches – the sort of lights you would find in an urban squat, to cast all the necessary light. Every single camera set-up required each of the lights to be moved, balanced, adjusted and moved again to create the best atmospheric lighting conditions without casting shadows of the entire crew across the back wall of the shot. Sadly, this meant there are many changes in lighting from shot to shot in the final edit, preventing many shots from cutting together convincingly.

The rush to get through the shoot took its toll on everyone, but all the volunteers were wonderful. They offered ideas, experimented numerous different ways of carrying out each shot to find the best solution and generally had a ball in pulling this three minute scene together. Regardless of the hard work and the pressures, everyone was giving their time for free because they love producing work like this. This wasn’t work, this was fun. By the time we left the derelict house at 6pm, we were exhausted, hungry and sick of the smell from the house. (You don’t want to know what one of the rooms had been used for by previous ‘visitors’).

The week that followed saw me glued to my PC. At one stage, I had the PC in bits on the dining room table when I realised I needed to install a new firewire card and boost the power to get a decent transfer of video from the camera to the hard drive.

And then there was the moment of horror when I realised a key shot was missing. In the rush from one camera set-up to another, I had completely missed one shot from the storyboard. I still don’t know how it could have been missed as it was clearly illustrated on the storyboards. No matter how I tried to recut the scene using the existing shots, I couldn’t convey the moment when Adrian grabs Jessica by the throat and pushes her into the wall – an important moment that causes the action to leap if left out.

After a couple of sleepless nights, I hit upon a solution. I took an outtake from a later shot depicting Matt letting go of Nicole’s neck, throwing her aside. By cutting it very tight and reversing the footage with some nifty software I downloaded, it almost looked like Matt was grabbing Nicole by the throat and pushing her back instead of pulling her forward and letting go. Almost. If you squinted. And if I gave you a few beers first.

With that problem sorted, I was running against the clock. Editing in any spare moment, I was often to be seen on the train commuting to work with my laptop open, desperately trying to knock it into shape.

Straight to Video

I recently came across the original video file and thought – rough as it is – it could at least make an interesting accompaniment to the script on my website. At the very least it could be a blog post. So here it is. Now you know the story behind the video, I hope you will forgive the crudity, ignore the many mistakes and faults and admire the pluck of all involved.

Just as an aside - my daughter makes a very brief cameo, running away from the camera in the opening moments accompanied by an ex-girlfriend.

One thing this experience taught me was to stick to writing. Although I knew the principles of directing from my university studies, this was not my scene. I want to produce a wonderful script and then have a talented director craft it into a fantastic film. I know that if I were to ever direct my own work, I would risk turning my hard work into a forgettable and rather embarrassing farce.

I have learned my limitations. If I ever get ideas about directing my own vision, I only have to pull out this video and remember the fortnight of hell that went into producing it.

I hope you enjoy it on some level. If it intrigues you, read the complete script. I am currently working on a brand new – and quite different – draft, so any feedback, criticisms and praise would be very useful.

It’s been quiet in these parts for the last few days due to my teenage daughter descending on us for the school holidays. Suddenly, life revolves around entertaining someone whose default setting seems to be ‘bored’.

I originally started putting together this weekly wrap-up yesterday, but found I had more to say on ‘Hancock’ than I thought – hence yesterday’s post. Since then, I’ve discovered I’m not the only one to have made the observation of the incredible change of direction at the halfway point. I’m just hoping that ‘The Dark Knight’ doesn’t disappoint, but early signs are good.

The Wedding Planner

No, not the godawful romcom from a few years ago. Although hiring a wedding planner, even one as annoying as J-Lo, would mean Shelley and I would not have to look at one more bridal magazine or spend hours walking from venue to potential venue.

Yup, I’m over the preparations with five months to go. Shelley’s lucky I love her so much because in most other situations I would already have started looking for a get-out clause...

Weddings must be one of the most ritualized activities we humans get up to. Think about it – all the nonsense over throwing bouquets, removing garters, ribbons on cars, cakes with more tiers than guests, the right music, the right bridal waltz, the correct speech etiquette. Yet if I dispensed with all of that and restricted the ceremony to the vows that count, how many people would feel we had somehow broken the unwritten rules?

There are times when I love ritual and silly superstition. Christmas for me always has to be just so and I will fight to the death to ensure the decorations come down on Twelfth Night and not a day later or sooner. (My other blog, ChristmasWatch, caters to this obsession of mine in the weeks building up to the big day - it's currently in the off-season.) But this wedding malarkey is getting ridiculous.

Yet society loves ritual. We thrive on having a particular way of doing things, even when we no longer remember why we do them. After all, who on earth dreamed up the tradition of peeling off a piece of the bride’s intimate apparel and throwing it at a baying pack of beer-fueled and testosterone pumped males? Isn’t the bridal waltz designed to completely humiliate the grooms two left feet in front of all the people he cares about? If I bump into my intended in the hallway the night before the wedding, why should we be condemned to a life of bad luck?

If you want to be completely put off the idea of getting married, have a look at some of the freakier wedding superstitions. The idea that whoever of the couple falls asleep first on the wedding night dies first has me packing the caffeine tablets and coffee percolator.

Nett Magazine

The latest edition of Nett Magazine should make it to Australian newsagents in the next few days, containing my article on the importance of blogs and email marketing in any online business strategy.

In the meantime, a couple of my previous articles for the mag are now available online. ‘Ka-Ching!’ looks at online payment system and interviews representatives of Paypal and St George Bank about the different methods available. Alternatively, ‘The Host With the Most’ offers advice on how to choose the right web hosting package for your business needs.

Netregistry and Planet Domain Posts

If you aren’t already aware, I also write regularly for both Netregistry and Planet Domain on internet issues affecting small business. (Netregistry owns both Nett Magazine and Planet Domain, providing me many gardens to play in.)

For Netregistry, I recently unleashed a couple of successful articles for their website. ‘The Wild, Wild West of Search Engine Marketing’ compares the new frontier of online business to that of the old gold-rush, with appropriate gunfights in black and white hats. Alternatively, for a quick look at some tips for email marketing campaigns, read ‘Return to Sender’.

The Planet Domain Blog has been running for a few months now, with contributions from both myself and my glittering assistant, Stacey Manson. This week, the blog is relaunched with a fantastic new skin as the first stage in a complete update of the website. It looks fantastic - aside from a few css issues that are currently being tweaked. Again, the topics cover issues within the online marketing sphere. Recently, ‘Is Your Website a Google Athlete?’ was a particularly popular post.

As always, with anything you read, please Sphinn, Stumble and/or Digg as appropriate.

And Finally…

The 'Doctor Who' finale didn’t disappoint and achieved the highest ever chart placing the series has ever received in its 45 year history - #1. The previous highest position was held by the Christmas Day episode ‘Voyage of the Damned’ which made it to #2 behind the same day’s special edition of ‘Eastenders’. What is even more remarkable about the latest rating success is that it comes combined with an audience approval rating of 91. Scored out of 100, anything over 85 is considered ‘excellent’. 'Doctor Who' traditionally scores around 85-86. To achieve 91 for both the final episodes of the last series is not only a record for the show but also only matched by a tiny handful of mainstream shows since approval ratings were first taken. Never has such a high score been achieved with such high ratings, though, making this a double-whammy. With only four special episodes set to air in 2009 before Series 5 in 2010, the wait is going to be long and hard.

As you were. Class dismissed.

I don’t think anyone was surprised that the new Will Smith vehicle, ‘Hancock’ smashed the $100 million barrier on its opening weekend in the States. This creates a new record for Smith, the first star to have eight consecutive openings gross over $100 million. But what will be more interesting will be to see how the public reacts after seeing the film.

We saw the film last night and we’re rather surprised at how unrepresentative the trailer turned out to be. The first half of the film contains all the humour (most of which was in the trailer) while the second half turns to much darker territory – threatening to become a standard superhero flick with barely a laugh in sight. Of course, I’m not going to give away the twist here that signals the complete change in tone, but it is there, is unexpected and I know my family felt we had seen a different film to what we expected.

Creating expectation and hype for a film has always thrown up interesting dilemmas. Obviously, with ‘Hancock’, there was potential to sell it to the public as another Will Smith comedy – and everyone I know who saw the trailer laughed out loud and immediately wanted to see it. But did the trailer misrepresent the film?

It is quite common for a trailer to take most of its signature moments from the first half of a film. The first half is usually where the fun of the initial concept is played out, so it provides the best material to get that concept across to an audience in the shortest way possible. ‘Hancock’ is no different. Virtually the entire trailer is cut from the first half. But the problem with ‘Hancock’ is that the second half is a very different film. Once the gag of the drunken derelict superhero has been played out for laughs, the story actually has to go somewhere, and where it decides to go is surprising. It certainly doesn’t go where this cynical movie-watcher expected the traditional formula to take it.

I think my issue with the marketing of the film is more a problem of the film rather than the language of modern trailers. The trailer certainly did what it was designed to achieve – brought people into the cinemas – by using the best tools in its arsenal – Will Smith and comedy. A more honest trailer may not have attracted the audience that gave Smith his new record. What this issue highlights is a weakness within the format and structure of the film itself and this can probably be traced back to the origins of the script before it was pulped by the Hollywood machine.

’Hancock’ started life as a spec script from Vincent Ngo entitled ‘Tonight He Comes’ (pdf file). The original draft was clearly not a comedy, but instead a dark and emotional tale of a superhero completely out of touch with the people he protects. Producers Michael Mann and Akiva Goldsman decided to transform the script into something with more mainstream appeal. New writers were brought on board before Vince Gilligan's rewrite finally got the green light. The comedy potential was exploited by exaggerating the lead character’s boorish behaviour. Some of the more adult themes were toned down. I would be very interested to read the original script to better decide whether I agree with these decisions or not. Yet, there is a niggling feeling that in processing the script through the Hollywood machine, the final result is maybe less coherent and effective than the original premise, even if ‘Hancock’ will undoubtedly attract higher audiences.

So, don’t go to ‘Hancock’ expecting a huge belly-buster of a comedy. There are plenty of laughs in there (even some not in the trailer), but also plenty of dark moments and some pretty bleak stuff towards the end. ‘Hancock’ would best be described as two films shoe-horned together; a comedy and an action blockbuster, never quite sure which it wants to be. It is a shame the two genres couldn’t be more satisfactorily blended instead of the complete 180 the film currently attempts.

My computer hates me. For some reason, it believes it should be given a break every now and then from the constant workload and overnight tasks I set it. So I’m interpreting last night’s meltdown as a form of tech protest. 

So it looks like I’m without the main machine again until the weekend, forcing me to resort to quick posts in my lunch hour at work and working from the mini laptop – the Asus Eee – at home. As long as I get the treacherous tower back by the weekend, I won’t start panicking about downloading this Saturday’s ‘Doctor Who’ finale.

Speaking of which…

Doctor Who and the Search Engine of Death

A website lives on traffic, and sometimes the hardest part of being a blogger is finding the topics that people want to read. It is just wonderful when these questions become easy.

Last week’s ‘Doctor Who’ episode certainly created an online furore. So it made perfect sense to produce a blog post that would rank highly for the popular search engine keywords ‘doctor who finale spoilers’ and variations thereof.

The resulting post – ‘Doctor Who and the Spoilers of Evil’ – has started to do its job, drawing a huge amount of traffic from Google and the other search engines. In fact, this Google traffic far outstrips any other traffic source for the last 24 hours, impressive considering how much StumbleUpon traffic this blog receives. At this stage, the post has barely received any SU traffic, receiving its huge performance entirely from Google, which is just fantastic, and demonstrates how the right content at the right time is better than almost any other SEO strategy.

One way of tapping into popular search topics is to use Google’s Zeitgeist tool. This tool ranks the search phrases that have seen the most increase within the previous month, providing a useful aid for bloggers to decide on the topics that people are most interested in finding.

Although the international version hasn’t been updated since December 2007, the different countries are served with monthly top 20 updates. For example, the latest report for Australia covers the searches with the highest increase in May (June should follow any day now). Interestingly, it seems the number one spot is currently taken by ‘baseball’, followed by ‘Mother Theresa’. So if you can craft a blog post about Mother Theresa’s love for sneaking between bases during a pitcher’s wind-up, you can expect more traffic from Australian users.

The ADMA Forum

As mentioned last week, I spent a few days at the ADMA Forum – a conference for marketers and businesses interested in cutting-edge direct marketing strategies. The most interesting seminars, for me, revolved around email, interactive and mobile marketing.

I spent a long time talking with many of the exhibitors about their experiences in the Australian market. One overwhelming trend was the sense that all marketers were extremely excited to find opportunities to use the imaginative strategies and try out new ideas in the online and mobile spaces, but that Australian business was still very traditional and hesitant.

Australia has always lagged behind the rest of the world in adopting new marketing trends. I recently wrote an article for Nett Magazine (in Australian newsagents from July 18) pointing out the benefits of email marketing and blogging in a nation where most businesses haven’t started exploiting these trends. The blogging section was very hard to find sources for, as very few Australian businesses, outside of the SEO field, currently use blogs with any success.

Predictably, therefore, there were a number of people saying how much they wanted to try some of these strategies, whilst lacking the budget, the clients or the nerve to do so.

Writing With W

I have to share this with you, a wonderful piece of writing I discovered through StumbleUpon.

The Young Writer’s Blog recently devoted a post to a Victorian piece of writing by an unknown author. At 450 words long, it is remarkable for only using words that start with the letter ‘W’. You have to read ‘Winnie and Walter’ and wallow in the witty and wholly wonderful wordplay.

An Award – CopyWrite Wins an Award!

Finally, thanks to Webmistress over at Plotdog Press for awarding CopyWrite the ‘Arte y Pico’ Award. Awarded by Plot Dog to five blogs in recognition of support given, comments made and general all-round blogging community spirit, it’s a nice award to have.

The rules of the Arte y Pico award require me to similarly award five noteworthy blogs, meaning this award is more viral and link-building, which is only a good thing.

Therefore, without further ado, the five blogs to which I am awarding the Arte y Pico award, for their wonderful support and general all-round faberooniness, are, in no particular order;

1. Smithereens from Daniel Smith
2. Get Paid to Write Online from Sharon Hurley
3. The Weakest Link by Erik Johnels
4. Rob's Megaphone by Robert Stevenson
5. Dancing About Architecture by Riayn

The Rules thanks to arteypico.blogspot.com:

Rules:

1) You have to pick 5 blogs that you consider deserving of this award; through creativity, design, interesting material, and also contributing to the blogger community, no matter in which language.

2) Each award has to have the name of the author and also a link to his or her blog to be visited by everyone.

3) Each award-winning blog has to show the award and include the name and link of the blog that has given the award to them.

4) The award-winning blog and the blog awarding the prize has to include a link to "Arte y pico"blog , outlining the origin of this award.

5) To show these rules.

And Finally…

’Kung Fu Panda’ is the best animated film from the Dreamworks stable since… ever. Shelley and I loved it to bits. Go see it.

My post on the state of British comics received plenty of positive feedback from others who feel as I do, but not much in the way of traffic. If you enjoyed British comics growing up, have a read and give it a Stumble or a Digg if you enjoy it.

Class dismissed.

Warning: The following post discusses events from episode 12 of ‘Doctor Who Series 4. Do not read on if you are trying to avoid spoilers for episode 12 – ’The Stolen Earth’. The post does NOT contain spoilers for the finale – ’Journey’s End’’.

This post is about spoilers and in no way tries to create any. So if anyone decides to add a comment claiming they have a spoiler or have worked out the answer to the ‘Doctor Who finale, it will NOT get posted. But, as I will have been exposed to the offending comment in order to delete it, I will track your ISP and hunt you down with a rusty knife. Comprende?

Since last Saturday’s episode of ‘Doctor Who’, I have had a number of people ask me what is happening, in the belief that if anyone would know, it would be me. But, for once, no one seems to know outside of the production team.

To say that Russell T Davies and his band have pulled off a pretty impressive coup would be understating the impact the episode had on an audience conditioned to expect spoilers and pre-publicity to lay out the major plot points and twists in advance. But the shock everyone felt as the Doctor seemingly regenerated, has brought back the thrill of those long gone days when spoilers weren’t an issue and every new episode was completely fresh and new.

For those of you hoping the ‘Journey’s End’ trailer may contain a clue, here it is.

No clues there then.

The History of Doctor Who Spoilers

Spoilers have been with us for as long as media has reported on the most popular television programs. With ‘Doctor Who, spoilers became a common hazard the moment ‘Doctor Who Weekly’ (later ‘Doctor Who Magazine’) started reporting on the production cycle of the program. As a young boy, suddenly I knew which monsters were due to appear in the upcoming series. I knew months in advance that the Doctor would regenerate (from Tom Baker to Peter Davison). Back then, the BBC’s attempts to hide spoilers were rather lame affairs, consisting of hiding the true identity of the villain as an anagram in the ‘Radio Times’ cast listing. Usually, within a day of the ‘Radio Times’ going on sale, some quick-witted fan would have deciphered James Stoker as an anagram of ‘Master’s Joke’, letting us all know to expect Anthony Ainley in an unconvincing disguise, only to reveal himself as the arch-nemesis at an appropriate cliff-hanger.

John-Nathan Turner famously took revenge on the spoiler-makers. During the production of series 21, John was due to be interviewed by various fanzine editors in his office. Before the meeting, John made an addition to the large wall-planner behind him that tracked the production schedule of the series. He added a new story title, one that hadn’t previously been released. A few weeks later, ‘DWB’ published their ‘scoop’ that the penultimate story in the series would be entitled ‘The Doctor’s Wife’. Gary Levy, the editor in question, and JNT had a very uneasy relationship after that.

Recently, Russell T Davies has repeatedly lamented the day when ‘Doctor Who’ contained surprises, when major plot twists remained hidden. With the Series One relaunch of the series, the intention had always been to keep Christopher Eccleston’s regeneration secret. This feeble attempt at subterfuge with a ravenous media lasted all of one week, as The Sun announced Eccleston was leaving in their paper released the morning after the first episode was broadcast. Yup, one day into the new series, and the biggest spoiler was already out.

Russell Learns to Keep a Secret

After this huge failure to protect the series’ secrets, the production team have become more adept and – let’s face it – down right sneaky, to protect their plans. Two years ago, Billie Piper and Russell T Davies were swearing blind that Rose was gone, there was no way back and Billie was ready to move on. All the time, behind all their earnest denials of any plans to bring Rose back, the return was already plotted out. In fact, Rose’s return was planned even before ‘Doomsday’ was shot. Sneaky buggers.

But this time, the team have excelled themselves. Fans around the world choked on their tea and biscuits and leapt to their keyboards within seconds of the closing titles to find out how they could possibly have got it all so wrong.

The Rumour Mill Goes Wild

In the absence of concrete spoilers, the rumour mill goes into overdrive. The most tenuous ideas gain support. Grainy photos shot at a distance of location filming taking place are revisited and analysed for clues. It’s as if some fans just can’t stand the idea of not knowing what happens next. Or, more importantly, not being the first to work it out and gain the respect of their peers for being the clever guy with the inside knowledge.

The truth is, not a single site on the internet seems to have the inside story. Plenty of speculation – the British tabloids have started running their books on who the next Doctor is going to be. (Apparently, Robert Carlyle is odds on favourite). And, inevitably, plenty of fans thinking they have the answer. Lots of statements of “Well, I know David can’t be leaving because…” or “I’ve discovered who the new Doctor is and its…”.

(I’ve decided to spoiler proof the next paragraph in hidden text, just because I couldn’t decide whether it was a spoiler or not. It doesn’t provide an answer, but points out where both sides are drawing their assumptions from – based on well-publicised rumours from weeks ago, which may be enough to annoy some people. I just don’t want to risk putting someone on the right track. Just highlight the text with your mouse to read it.)

The spoiler-obsessed fans (and that should be enough to go after them with blunt instruments) are basing their assumptions on the forthcoming Christmas special. As the special has already finished filming, there are claims from people who witnessed the location filming that David Tennant appears. Of course, this proves nothing, as it could easily be a flash-back. But, then there are also other people claiming that a certain actor, who will remain nameless, was sighted playing the Doctor at this same location filming. (No, I’m not going to link to these rumours.) So who is the Doctor in the Christmas special - Tennant or Mr X? Of course, we can’t know. Two completely opposing stories, both insisting they are right. Aren’t rumours fun?

Ignorance is Bliss

No one knows. No one can possibly know. Everything is just rumour and nothing I have seen or heard even remotely adds up with everything else. This time, the team have really covered their bases and protected their plans from the internet gossiping hoards. No doubt, there has been deliberate obfuscation and probably a few porkies flying around to keep fans off the scent, so don’t believe anything you hear or read, including the above hidden text.

For once, everything really is just rumour, no tabloid has the real story (and don’t they hate that) and fans are dragging up all kinds of rumours and tenuous arguments to try and feel big about themselves.

I’m glad I don’t know what is going to happen this coming Saturday. I’m glad the trailer tells us nothing and there are no clues to be found anywhere. This weekend, I’ll be sitting down with the family completely unprepared and unaware of absolutely anything to be presented in the bumper-length finale episode (65 minutes people!)

After all, do you take a peak under the wrapping paper at Christmas or leave them until the morning? I know which is more satisfying.

I must have been five or six when my Dad took my younger brother and me to the local newsagents one Saturday afternoon to choose a comic each. We debated the various merits of each comic before we both settled on a title. My brother chose ‘Pippin’, a title aimed at early readers and featuring recognisable characters such as ‘Larry the Lamb’ and ‘Trumpton’. I chose ‘TV Comic’. It had some of my favourite TV shows in comic form, including 'Dad's Army' and ‘Doctor Who’, and during the '70s, always had a colourful ‘Tom and Jerry’ strip on the cover. Dad added both comics to his newspaper order, so that every Saturday morning, the latest issues would slide through the letter box onto the mat.

Saturday Morning Nostalgia

I loved Saturday mornings. I’d hear the clatter of the letter box and would quickly nip downstairs to grab my comic before sliding back into my warm bed to read it, cover to cover. And so my love for comics began. I have read them obsessively ever since and see them as a huge influence on not only my reading ability from a young age but also my imagination and love for storytelling.

Another day clearly sticks in my mind. Again, I must have been about six and had found a new comic in the newsagent, the cover of which grabbed me and dared me to take it home. This comic promised thrills and adventure and excitement – plus a free gift (British comics often launched with free gifts attached to the cover). The comic was the short-lived ‘Vulcan’. At six, I wasn’t aware that it was an all-reprint comic, but that wouldn’t have mattered anyway. ‘The Spider’ was reprinted from ‘Lion’, ‘The Steel Claw’ from ‘Valiant’, ‘The Trigan Empire’ from ‘Look and Learn’, and so on.

I raced home to my room to devour these tales of heroes and monsters and spaceships and guns and… My Mum caught sight of it and wasn’t impressed. She forbade me buying the comic ever again, insisting that I was too young for such stuff. These days, of course, most parents wouldn’t have even shrugged as there is far more controversial stuff in Saturday morning cartoons, but my Mum wasn’t comfortable with my arbitrary shift away from the safety of ‘TV Comic’ into a world of violent adventure.

I was devastated and can still remember the loss I felt, even today. Scary, huh? Anyone got a reprinted compendium of ‘The Trigan Empire’ they want to lend me?

Decline and Fall

Sadly, the British comics industry is not what it once was, and today’s kids are the losers. Comics are an incredibly effective way to get kids reading, especially as the format of complimentary pictures and text allows a child to more effectively determine context and meaning when trying to decipher the words. Yet comics in their heyday were more than that. They were a gateway to kid’s imaginations, opening up their eyes to an immense number of ideas and creative style.

British comics had been a major part of growing up since the 1930s and the arrival of ‘The Beano’ and ‘The Dandy’.

Although American comics would make their way to England, British Comics developed a different style. The American comics were monthly titles, and by the time copies started to reach England, the format often featured only one lead story, and one genre– ‘Batman’, ‘Superman’, ‘Captain Marvel’, etc. British Comics were predominantly weekly anthologies, featuring a number of strips, ranging from 1 to 4 or more pages. A single comic could contain comedy, drama, sci-fi, western and romance.

Decades of Comics Fun

’The Beano’ and ‘The Dandy’ were entirely humour titles, introducing kids to ‘Dennis the Menace’ and ‘Desperate Dan’, ‘Korky the Cat’ and the ‘Bash Street Kids’. These characters survive today, ranking alongside ‘Superman’ and ‘Batman’ as the longest serving characters in comics. Rarely do these characters receive the recognition for their longevity and cultural power, outside Britain.

Other comics would also run for decades, introducing children to all manner of narrative styles. ‘Whizzer and Chips’ (1969 – 1990), ‘The Hotspur’ (1933 – 1981), ‘Tiger’ (1954 – 1985), ‘Lion’ (1952 - 1974) and ‘Wizard’ (1922 – 1964) are barely a few notable mentions in an incredibly diverse comic history. Remember, these comics were weekly. Unlike American comics where ten years would mean only 120 issues, some of these British titles numbered their back-issues in the thousands. A subscription to ‘Lion’ or ‘Hotspur’ could fill up cupboard space in no time.

As you can see from the dates of some of these titles, British comics didn’t go through the same upheaval as American comics, where very few titles survived the arrival of the superhero genre in 1937. British comics that were popular in the 1920s would still be popular in the 1960s, passing through generations of readerships.

I should make a distinction here. In the early days, British comics were more correctly referred to as ‘Boy’s Papers’, featuring a mix of illustrated stories, prose, articles and news. For example, ‘The Hotspur’ only dropped these additional features, relaunching to become a complete comic in 1959. But for most British kids, there was nothing wrong with breaking up their comic reading with articles on history, prose serialisations and photo-essays of news events. And whereas today some kids would avoid this attempt to shoehorn education into their entertainment, back then that was entertaining. That was the established format and kids bought these comics in their thousands.

And then there was ‘Eagle’ –probably the best comic ever produced.

The Best of Them All

Launched in 1952, ‘Eagle’ was devised by a vicar called Marcus Morris in response to the rise in importation of American EC horror comics. As many American comics had made it across the Atlantic with GIs during the War, many British kids were exposed to these genres for the first time. Appalled at what he saw as terrible storytelling, macabre images and adult content of the American comics, Morris drew together some of the greatest comic creators to develop a new boy’s paper that would provide the same thrills in a more responsible way.

’Eagle’ soon supplanted these brief invaders and became, arguably, the most fondly remembered comic in the history of British publishing. Introducing sci-fi adventure with ‘Dan Dare’ (for my money, still the best-quality comic strip ever produced - Frank Hampson is a hero), comedy with ‘Harris Tweed', adventure with ‘PC49’ and ‘Riders of the Range’, and peppered with articles, informative biographies and plenty of reader-generated content, ‘Eagle’ became a phenomenon, selling out from the very first issue.

There were ‘Eagle' hosted carol services every Christmas. ‘Eagle’ holiday shows in many seaside resorts during the summer months. An ‘Eagle’ radio show became popular, with a sing-along every week of the official son – ‘Spread Your Wings’. This was more than a comic, it was a way of life for thousands of children in the ‘50s and ‘60s, my Dad among them.

The British Comics Heyday

Although ‘Eagle’ declined in sales towards the end of the ‘60s, this was partly due to the plethora of new titles that had begun to appear. The late ‘60s and ‘70s were a heyday for British comics, with new titles seemingly popping up every week. There were comics for girls such as ‘Judy’, ‘Jackie’ and ‘Bunty’, war comics such as ‘Battle’, ‘Victor’ and ‘Valiant’, new funny comics such as 'Whoopee', 'Monster Fun' and 'Krazy', sports comics such as ‘Tiger’ and ‘Roy of the Rovers’ and action comics such as ‘Vulcan’, ‘Hotspur’ and ‘Lion’ and, after ‘Star Wars’ became a box-office success, sci-fi comics popped up with ‘Starlord’, ‘2000AD’ and a relaunched ‘Eagle’.

Each comic attracted reader allegiances, spurred on by the lead character that would often dominate the cover strip. ‘Robot Archie’ stared out from the cover of ‘Lion’. ‘Dan Dare' set-up camp on the cover of ‘Eagle’. ‘Judge Dredd’ was the poster-boy for '2000AD'. ‘Desperate Dan’ represented ‘The Dandy'. ‘Dennis the Menace’ occupied ‘The Beano’. ‘Roy of the Rovers’ led ‘Tiger’, before spinning off into his own comic.

To British adults, some of these characters carry far more nostalgia and fond memories than the superhero comics that for many years only made their way to Britain as reprints. The Marvel comics were aggressively marketed to Britain in the 1960s, leading to a new brand - Marvel UK in 1972, with new anthology titles set up to present these tales in a format with which British kids were familiar. That meant chopping up the monthly titles into weekly instalments and reconstructing them as anthologies. This did lead to some peculiar cliff-hangers, as adventures had to be cut after the requisite number of pages, regardless of what was happening in the scene. These reprinted superhero comics were still very popular among British kids, but in no way supplanted our loyalties from our own comics. After all, the styles were completely different. I couldn’t get western adventure or war thrills or sci-fi future-scapes in the superhero comics – they could only provide costumed blokes hitting each other week-in week-out.

The Disappearing Comics

But the bubble burst. The 1980s saw a huge decline in comic readership, and many titles folded. By the mid-‘90s, barely any of these titles would survive. Today, ‘The Beano’, ‘The Dandy’ and ‘2000AD’ are, I think, the only survivors from a time when every child would have an allegiance to a title and a host of characters they would defend to the death (or a skinned knee) in the playground. Even amongst those three, ‘2000AD’ has changed its target audience, growing up with readers so that now it is very much a more adult title, wholly unsuitable for under-tens.

There were a number of factors that contributed to the decline in the British comics industry. Many of the companies overstretched themselves and were not able to cope when a decline came. Other forms of entertainment such as video games and 24-hour television competed for the allegiances of children. The local reprinting and importing of American comics provided additional competition, especially as producing reprints was also far cheaper and as superheroes grew in popularity through TV shows.

I credit comics with helping me achieve a reading standard way above average in my primary school years. They were safe, and exhilarating and imaginative and just plain wonderful. Much as I love the America superhero genre, they will never come close to the breadth of ideas and stories I could receive in one weekly issue.

It disappointed me that I was never able to take my daughter to the local newsagent and help her to choose a comic (or should I say girl’s paper) that we could add to our delivery order for her Saturday morning reading. It still disappoints me that such a rich seam of creativity and imagination has virtually died out, with most British comic creators now working entirely within American superhero comics.

I just want to hear that letter-box flap again so I can sneak downstairs in my slippers and find a bundle of excitement staring up at me from the mat.

(Don't forget to also read - "A Lament for Children's Television" and return soon for part two of the Lament for Children's Comics, looking at the American market.)

Deadlines crunching, time evaporating, tension rising… This week has seen work go crazy. I need a holiday. Meanwhile, I made another public grammar gaff and managed to turn it into another popular post – Grammar Wars III. Anyone else think it’s funny how I can always turn an idiotic mistake into a perceptive example of modern grammar usage worthy of discussion? Diverts attention from my own idiocy admirably.

Can Someone Put the Supa Back in Supanova

Yup, the Supanova Pop Culture Expo was on again in Sydney last weekend, and as usual, Hazel and I spent way too much money in a complete geek frenzy.

This year was rather disappointing for us as the guests were rather uninspiring. This is not to criticise the appearances of Joe Jusko, Ben Templesmith (follow Ben on Twitter, he’s one of the best new-breed artists in comics) and Howard Chaykin - wonderful artists all - but I miss the days when we would see Mark Silvestri and Brian Bendis signing autographs for obscenely long queues snaking around each other, or Mark Waid and Michael Turner competing for fan attention. Real A-league hitters that bring hundreds of fans running.

On the TV and film front, it was the same US shows being represented. A 'Star Trek' actor – check. Someone from a Joss Whedon show – check. 'Battlestar Galactica' or 'Stargate' – check. Many fans have been pleading for something different from the same US genre shows for years but to no avail. 'Doctor Who' is the most unrecognised show at Supanova, despite the number of Captain Jacks and Tenth Doctors walking around.

For my part, Hazel and I spent up big on 'Doctor Who' toys, although we balked at the voice control Dalek. At $280, I would have had a hard time justifying that to my better half on returning home and my sofa just doesn’t support my back well enough if I lay on it too long. Having said that, finding the 'Doctor Who' Micro Universe Figures in Australia was a first for us, even if the game they represent turned out to be rather boring.

I was able to fill some gaps in my silver age comic collection. A while ago, I made the painful decision to limit my comic collecting to three core books, as my comic collecting was not only getting very expensive but also threatened to take up every spare unit of storage in the flat. Now limited to only 'Daredevil', 'Fantastic Four' and 'Amazing Spider-Man', I hunt down rare issues to fill the gaps in my collection whenever I can.

A Comic Dealer Starts To Cry

The best find of the day came out of a $2.00 box. Some of you may have gathered from my online name – Kimota – that I’m a bit of a 'Marvelman' fan ('Miracleman' if you’re in the States). I owned every appearance of the character since his ‘80s relaunch except for one short tale that appeared in issue 4 of ''Warrior Magazine' over twenty years ago (also featuring one of the first appearances of 'V For Vendetta'). Never reprinted, this Alan Moore / Steve Dillon collaboration had always eluded me.

Not only did I pick up this issue in perfect nick for only $2.00, but on the train on the way home I inspected what I thought was a biro scribble on the front cover only to discover it was signed by Alan Moore himself. A brief note on the plastic bag from the original comic dealer confirmed this was so - something the guy who sold it to me must have missed cause he could easily have added a couple of noughts to the price.

The comic fans amongst you just gasped – the rest shrugged, wondering what the fuss is about. Let me put it this way. Moore hasn’t done a comic signing for over twenty years and is notoriously difficult to get to conventions. This means autographs are hard to come by, except on his 'Lost Girls' book he performed a special signing for earlier this year. Alan Moore is also the undisputed king of comic writers. Finding his autograph like this is like picking up a copy of 'Great Expectations' in a second had-shop only to find Charles Sickens inscribed on the fly sheet.

ADMA and the Future of Marketing

Today and for the next two days, I am attending the ADMA Forum – the premier marketing conference in Australia. Plenty of interesting seminars, but a common theme is already coming through. Australia is so far behind Europe and the US in adopting new technology.

I still have debates with clients over the importance of social media. The people who tell me YouTube doesn’t work because when they tried it by putting up a corporate video of their CEO talking about the business, no one watched it. The people who created a Facebook page and sat back waiting for the big social media explosion and then complained when they had no friends after a week of inactivity.

What was clear today was that the marketing industry is foaming at the mouth to try these strategies and exploit these new technologies. Sadly, the clients we work with a far more conservative in this country.

I’ll write up a full summary of the event over the weekend.

And Finally…

'Doctor Who' Episode 11 – 'Turn Left' – was probably the best episode of the series so far. Catherine Tate is the best thing to happen to the series since David Tennant and I really hope she sticks around beyond t