Amateur Writer Misconceptions That Should Be Punished!

Over the years, I have been involved in various writing communities and have come across 'aspiring writers' that operate under some incredible misapprehensions and downright delusions that make me want to set about them with a rusty iron bar.

My legal advice tells me that it is probably more prudent to vent on the blog instead, as blood is hard to wash out.

This is going to sound like sour grapes as, although I am a professional copywriter by day, by night I still characterise myself as an amateur script writer looking for that big break.

But, in the interests of keeping my blood pressure low, here are, in my opinion, five of the most annoying mistaken beliefs of amateur writers.

1. "Grammar, punctuation and spelling are for wimps."

It's amazing how often I come across committed wannabe writers on the internet, convinced of their misunderstood talent, who still make very basic mistakes in grammar and spelling and don't know their semi-colon from their apostrophe.

And it's not just amateurs. Bloggers also commonly fall into this category of those who should be horsewhipped for crimes against English.

To misuse words shows a huge disrespect for the tools of the craft. If a mechanic didn't respect his tools, he would have no chance of repairing my car, so why do amateur writers not understand the importance of strong spelling and clear grammar?

I have always been fascinated with words, since I first learnt to read. Although never formally trained in grammar at school, I was interested enough to want to learn. Through reading - a lot - and listening - a lot - I developed a strong understanding of correct usage that has gained me work.

Good writers have an inherent interest in the structure, history and derivations of the language. Bad writers rely on spell-check and the green squiggly lines under their hellish missives.

2. "Structure is boring. My talent is stifled by structure."

How many first novels or debut film scripts that defy convention and challenge existing notions of structure and style become instant classics? Some amateur writers are always ready to list names of writers who subverted the form in defense of their own incoherent scribblings. But no amateur writer I have ever met could realistically describe themselves as a Tarantino or Gaiman or Amis, awaiting discovery.

Writers who argue against established conventions of structure do so because those same conventions reveal the flaws in their own manuscripts. There is a reason why these conventions became established in the first place - they work.

It is no mistake that the greatest literary works of our time subscribe to the same conventions. Casablanca is a beautiful example of the three act structure supporting an incredible script. Harry Potter novels unashamedly follow established patterns of structure to provide a consistent framework.

There are also many classic works that break established structure, but the secret to breaking structure is to understand it first. Amateur writers argue against structure out of fear or failure to understand. Experienced writers break structure out of a deep understanding of how and why the basic building blocks work.

3. "I'm into comics, therefore I only want to write comics."

Fanboys aren't writers and writers aren't exclusive to one form. If your motivation to write is borne out of your fanatical devotion to a particular genre - comics, movies, novels, etc - then it is questionable. Writers write because they can't help themselves. They don't restrict themselves to only one form. Writers inevitably specialise as everyone has strengths and weaknesses, but a writer should be just as prepared to try their hand at penning articles for a local newsletter as they are to attempt scripting their Spiderman magnum opus. The motivation for writing should be about wanting to work with words, not the genre, and definitely not a specific character.

The statement "I want to write for Doctor Who" should immediately bar that person from any writing implements unless they have already previously proven their writing chops in a multitude of other forms.

The one addendum to this point is the area of fan fiction. There is nothing wrong with a passionate fanboy scribbling a detailed and complex tale of Star Trek characters meeting Buffy if the offending piece is only going to be read by other fans through fanzines or fanfic websites. In fact, it can be a starting point, and the writer can develop a passion for writing that outgrows this juvenile pastime. But if their ambition never extends beyond those particular characters or genres, there is no hope..

4. "Knowing the right people will make me a good writer."

Got to be careful with this one, as I have met some people who live by this statement. Networking is a fantastic tool, and any professional needs to know how to get the ear of those people with the power to make decisions. Shaking hands with editors, exchanging email addresses with producers, joining reputable writer's groups; all are important weapons in the amateur writer's arsenal. But these techniques don't make up for bad writing.

Some of the biggest names in the local amateur writing circuit aren't necessarily the best writers waiting to be discovered - they are just the ones who self-promote more successfully than those of us actually beavering away at our craft. Such personalities are usually motivated by wanting a certain level of celebrity by association - even if that celebrity is only amongst their amateur writing peers. Very rarely does it translate into industry success.

So what if he once got a three page story published in the back of a magazine and once spoke with a film studio about an idea he once had? If months have passed and nothing else has happened, it is pretty safe to bet that networking could only get him so far and his writing wasn't able to take him the rest of the way.

5. "I'm a writer, but I'm not working on anything at the moment."

How many amateur writers dream of breaking in but never actually write that novel or complete that screenplay? It is very easy to get lost in the online writing communities, swap advice, compare notes and track trends, but are you actually writing anything?

If you want to create a career for yourself as writer, you need to be able to write every day, not just when the mood takes you. Calling yourself a writer when you haven't written anything new since finishing that rejected novel five years ago only irks those of us who are still hammering away at the craft.

It doesn't matter if everything you write is rubbish. By writing regularly and often your skill will improve. You will learn from your mistakes. The logic of structure will become apparent.

Claiming to be an aspiring writer is the easiest thing to say at parties to sound cool to that pretty blonde chick in the corner, but it requires more commitment than just a vague fantasy.